The Lost Art of LingeringGetting beyond superficial relationships in a fast-paced world.Shawn Young| Topics: | Balance, Christian life, Hospitality, Priorities, Relationships, Stewardship, Time |
| Filters: | Greeter, Hospitality, Mentoring, Outreach, Pastor, Volunteer |
| Purpose: | Fellowship |
| References: | John 13:34-35 , Romans 12:10 |
| Date Added: | July 12, 2007 |
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Don't apply the "cheap and easy" mentality of consumerism to relationships with God and each other.
Have you ever noticed how long it takes to make microwave popcorn? "Delicious popcorn in only three minutes!" Well, that's what it says on the bag, but standing there waiting for it to get done seems like an eternity.
We live in a microwave society. We've come to expect that everything in life will take only three minutes. But the best things, the most important things in life, cannot be microwaved. Our relationship with God and our fellowship with one another are two of the greatest things in life, yet we have scarcely understood how these relationships grow. It troubles me to see things like The One-Minute Study Bible. Do we really expect to have a meaningful relationship with God if all we can give him is one minute of our time? In the same way, we fill our schedules with so many "good" things, that we don't have time for true fellowship with other believers in Jesus.
When I first came to the University of Nevada at Reno, I noticed a trend among the Christian students. They made themselves busy going to every Christian concert, fellowship night and party, but struggled with shallow relationships. Just because we do more doesn't mean we are doing better. We American Christians have taken the "cheap and easy" mentality of consumerism, and applied it to our relationships with God and each other. As a result, we have many acquaintances but few committed friendships. We know trivial things about God and about other people and have stopped expecting anything more. We are surrounded by Christians, yet we have a nagging feeling of loneliness. Our efficient machines which promised to give us more leisure time have only increased our expectations and anxiety about being more productive. We have lost our appetite for the deeply satisfying rewards of true fellowship. The fact is, we are afraid of real Christian fellowship because it takes—you guessed it—time. If it can't be cooked in under three minutes, we don't want it. Somewhere between the microwave and the microchip, our society has lost the great art of lingering.
Last fall our Bible study leaders made a small but radical decision. They were meeting each week to study the passage they were going to lead the next week. They loved learning together, and would often take two hours just to study the passage because they wanted to answer every question thoroughly. Halfway through the semester, we evaluated how the leaders' meeting was going, and the leaders all agreed that two hours was not enough time to prepare for Bible study and still deepen their relationships with each other. So they decided to add another hour to the meeting just to share more about their lives with one another. This is a refreshing sign in a culture where Christians bring cellular phones to church, check their watches ten times during the service and then bolt for the exit as soon as the pastor offers his closing prayer. Our leaders are discovering the lost art of lingering—allowing enough time to discuss the really important things in life and taking time to get to know one another.
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