2 of 3
Worshiping to Distraction
With all the crazy things that happen in a church service, it's amazing that anyone can actually worship!
2 of 3
Our air-conditioned sanctuary also features overhead fans. One fan is directly over the pulpit. Occasionally some helpful usher turns the knob the wrong way and then disappears. The blades above my head begin spinning like a turbo-prop, threatening to lift the roof from the building. Tornadoes may be common in the Midwest but not on the platform of the church. If the ushers fail to notice the swirling debris around me, I can only hope the meaning of my hand signals registers with someone before I am swept up into glory. As a backup, I am preparing a sermon on the departure of Elijah, complete with visual aids. Late, grate comersI used to complain about latecomers. Not anymore. Recently our worship plans included a soloist singing, 'Jesus, He Meets You Where You Are,' as our choir provided backup. The service started. No soloist. I wasn't worried until I saw the look on our minister of music's face. Thirty minutes into the service it was time for the solo. The director casually announced that he would do his best to fill the part. Halfway through the song, choir members started signaling. The soloist had arrived. She joined in the song on her way to the platform and ministered one of the most powerful solos I have ever heard. It was as if we had planned it that way. They brought the afflictedOne Sunday I noticed a commotion near the back of the sanctuary. Someone was in some distress, but I was in the middle of my sermon. As I preached I wondered what to do. Although ushers were attending the person, they didn't move him, and many in the congregation weren't aware that anything was happening. When I heard the sirens, I knew it couldn't be ignored. At that point in the sermon, I was talking about the power of prayer. I said someone needed our prayers right then and walked down the aisle toward the ill man. I got there the same time the paramedics did. We prayed. Seconds later the ambulance sped off and I concluded my sermon. I can excuse someone's interrupting worship by having a heart attack, but what about the people who make the service sound like a tuberculosis ward? There is the one who insists on coughing up a lung every week. Another exerts tremendous force blowing indescribable things into a hanky, then looks around as if surprised by the outcome. And you can always count on the one who, at the most profound moments, emits a noise only a Canadian goose could appreciate. Water, water everywhereI have pastored three churches. All of them practice baptism by immersion. All are water retention challenged. |             |
share this page
